The Care Center is full of negative energy today. Many employees are experiencing the "Monday Blues".
Who am I kidding? "Monday Blues" is too nice. Today, many employees are being complete bitches. I think I would even lump myself into that category, although, in my own defence, I was very happy when I arrived at work today. After all, today is not yesterday!
The mentality of "I'm the only one with problems, and if I'm not then rest assured that at the very least, my problems are the worst problems!!" is running rampant from office to office.
I hope I survive the day! I think I need a vacation!
Monday, July 9, 2007
Relaxing Sunday
With girls camp upon me this weekend, I got permission from my boss to work Sunday through Thursday this week. This way I can go up to camp on Thursday afternoon and not worry about being short any hours on my check.
Sunday isn't a day that I normally work but I figured the exception could be made and that I might even enjoy the quiet office and low-key atmosphere. With no workshops to get to no one would be rushed and chaos would be at a minimum.
Words can't even begin to describe how wrong I was to assume that. I was wrong. So wrong.
By 8:30 I was clocked in and happily crunch data sheets. The office was quiet. No one knew I was here. It was lovely. Alas, I reached a point where I needed some data books from the supervisor's office so I left my safe haven and trekked down the hall. I should have listened to the little voices that were telling me to stay in the safety of the office!! (Doesn't everyone have those little voices? Don't tell me I'm the only one!)
I never made it to the data books. Before I could locate the supervisor a staff member found one of our ladies, I'll call her "V", laying on her bedroom floor in a pool of blood. She had taken a little tumble while trying to get up to change her television channel. Oops! I was the lucky one who agreed to take her in to the Emergency Room. Before I could get her out the door they decided that I since I was headed that way already, I should just take another resident too!!
A short while later, my car full of sick people, I arrived at the E.R. It was tricky getting them both inside simultaneously but I managed. I even got them settled into their respective beds okay. V relaxed on her bed and dozed off but the gentleman, "K", was not as comfortable. Can't say I blamed him, really. He would have nothing to do with the gown he was supposed to wear. Surprisingly, he did allowed them to attach the heart monitor and get a reading. When the wheelchair came to take him to get X-Rays he excitedly slid off the bed and got right into the chair. Weeeee! Free ride!! He did well in the X-Ray room. It was hard to get him in the correct positions since he didn't understand what was going on but we managed okay. Unfortunately he wet himself while they were taking the films. Pee everywhere. UGH! I didn't have a change of clothes for him. I called the care center and spoke with the nurse about having someone come over with a change of clothes for K. He said someone would be right over... and they were. But the message of "bring clean clothes with you" wasn't passed on so they arrived expecting to help me out and didn't have anything dry for me to put K into. I almost went in to panic mode at that point. It had been a battle royal to get K into the large diaper and scrub pants he was wearing and now I had nothing to put him in for the trip home! The staff person said they'd run get something for him and left again.
V was still in her bed at this point. A nurse had come and numbed up her cut but the doctor hadn't yet stitched her up. I continued to sit with K until an orderly came and said that they needed our spot! K wasn't even discharged yet and they needed his spot! WTF??!! We moved K over to V's area and just as I got him settled, the doctor came to give V her stitches. With no aide in the area, he asked ME to hold her head while he sewed it up!
!!@#$@!#!
Have I ever mentioned the horrible phobia I have when it comes to needles?
AHHHHHHHHH!!!
But I did it. I took a deep breathe, kept my cool, and did it without the doctor ever suspecting that I was dieing on the inside. I was one cool girl!! (Thank goodness I didn't faint!)
Another staff person showed up shortly after the doctor was done with some clothes for K. No shirt. But at least she had pants and underwear. Since he was already discharge she was able to take him back the care center while I waited with V. A short while later I was able to bring V back as well. Hooray!!
With an adventure under my belt, I settled in to my desk to actually do the work I had planned to do at the start of the day. Or so I thought. Apparently one of the men who lives here decided, yesterday, that he was going to walk to his parents house. He has traumatic brain injury and has no clue where they live, but he took off for their place never-the-less. Two hours later (about the time I arrived home from the E.R.) the staff were finally sending out people to search for him and beginning to think they should call the police. The family was contacted and since I was in the building, the nurse counting telling me as "contacting administrative staff". I asked what I could do to help and the nurse asked me to notify the administrator and wait by the phones. The missing resident called his family shortly after and his mother called me and gave his location. That little turkey was 47 blocks away at a local hospital. He had walked there in the few hours he'd been gone. I was sent to pick him up and as we drove away from the parking lot together I tripped my car's odometer. It was six miles back to the care center. It took 15 minutes to drive there. How he walked that far in that little amount of time I'll never know. (I secretly suspect that he left a little earlier than estimated.)
I finally clocked out and went home at shortly after 7:00 p.m. I slept really well that night!!
I'm never working on Sunday again.
Ms.B
Sunday isn't a day that I normally work but I figured the exception could be made and that I might even enjoy the quiet office and low-key atmosphere. With no workshops to get to no one would be rushed and chaos would be at a minimum.
Words can't even begin to describe how wrong I was to assume that. I was wrong. So wrong.
By 8:30 I was clocked in and happily crunch data sheets. The office was quiet. No one knew I was here. It was lovely. Alas, I reached a point where I needed some data books from the supervisor's office so I left my safe haven and trekked down the hall. I should have listened to the little voices that were telling me to stay in the safety of the office!! (Doesn't everyone have those little voices? Don't tell me I'm the only one!)
I never made it to the data books. Before I could locate the supervisor a staff member found one of our ladies, I'll call her "V", laying on her bedroom floor in a pool of blood. She had taken a little tumble while trying to get up to change her television channel. Oops! I was the lucky one who agreed to take her in to the Emergency Room. Before I could get her out the door they decided that I since I was headed that way already, I should just take another resident too!!
A short while later, my car full of sick people, I arrived at the E.R. It was tricky getting them both inside simultaneously but I managed. I even got them settled into their respective beds okay. V relaxed on her bed and dozed off but the gentleman, "K", was not as comfortable. Can't say I blamed him, really. He would have nothing to do with the gown he was supposed to wear. Surprisingly, he did allowed them to attach the heart monitor and get a reading. When the wheelchair came to take him to get X-Rays he excitedly slid off the bed and got right into the chair. Weeeee! Free ride!! He did well in the X-Ray room. It was hard to get him in the correct positions since he didn't understand what was going on but we managed okay. Unfortunately he wet himself while they were taking the films. Pee everywhere. UGH! I didn't have a change of clothes for him. I called the care center and spoke with the nurse about having someone come over with a change of clothes for K. He said someone would be right over... and they were. But the message of "bring clean clothes with you" wasn't passed on so they arrived expecting to help me out and didn't have anything dry for me to put K into. I almost went in to panic mode at that point. It had been a battle royal to get K into the large diaper and scrub pants he was wearing and now I had nothing to put him in for the trip home! The staff person said they'd run get something for him and left again.
V was still in her bed at this point. A nurse had come and numbed up her cut but the doctor hadn't yet stitched her up. I continued to sit with K until an orderly came and said that they needed our spot! K wasn't even discharged yet and they needed his spot! WTF??!! We moved K over to V's area and just as I got him settled, the doctor came to give V her stitches. With no aide in the area, he asked ME to hold her head while he sewed it up!
!!@#$@!#!
Have I ever mentioned the horrible phobia I have when it comes to needles?
AHHHHHHHHH!!!
But I did it. I took a deep breathe, kept my cool, and did it without the doctor ever suspecting that I was dieing on the inside. I was one cool girl!! (Thank goodness I didn't faint!)
Another staff person showed up shortly after the doctor was done with some clothes for K. No shirt. But at least she had pants and underwear. Since he was already discharge she was able to take him back the care center while I waited with V. A short while later I was able to bring V back as well. Hooray!!
With an adventure under my belt, I settled in to my desk to actually do the work I had planned to do at the start of the day. Or so I thought. Apparently one of the men who lives here decided, yesterday, that he was going to walk to his parents house. He has traumatic brain injury and has no clue where they live, but he took off for their place never-the-less. Two hours later (about the time I arrived home from the E.R.) the staff were finally sending out people to search for him and beginning to think they should call the police. The family was contacted and since I was in the building, the nurse counting telling me as "contacting administrative staff". I asked what I could do to help and the nurse asked me to notify the administrator and wait by the phones. The missing resident called his family shortly after and his mother called me and gave his location. That little turkey was 47 blocks away at a local hospital. He had walked there in the few hours he'd been gone. I was sent to pick him up and as we drove away from the parking lot together I tripped my car's odometer. It was six miles back to the care center. It took 15 minutes to drive there. How he walked that far in that little amount of time I'll never know. (I secretly suspect that he left a little earlier than estimated.)
I finally clocked out and went home at shortly after 7:00 p.m. I slept really well that night!!
I'm never working on Sunday again.
Ms.B
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
What a trio we must be...
It just occurred to me that I share an office with a woman who thinks she is full of worms, and another that doesn't realize that 12:10 comes in the a.m. AND the p.m.
Curiosity about what things I do that could drive them crazy in return started to build. I've spent the past few minutes tearing myself apart in my mind. I hope it was therapeutic and not detrimental to my self esteem.
1) I have a favorite pen. It is a cheap, BiC brand pen, but it is fine point. Fine point pens are the only pens I want anything to do with. I love them. Since my pens kept vanishing from my office I attacked my current one with the label maker. I didn't just put the label down the side of the pen. Oh no, that wouldn't do. I put it on there like a flag. ----And I have a nervous habit of spinning my pen in my fingers during meetings so the little flag whips around and around.
2) There are pictures of my dogs and cats hanging on my desk in the place where shots of happy, chubby babies should be. I update them frequently and share stories about them when mothers try to brag about their angelic children.
That is all I can think of. It is hard to critique yourself. Other than those two examples, I suppose I must be perfect! Yes. Perfect.
Curiosity about what things I do that could drive them crazy in return started to build. I've spent the past few minutes tearing myself apart in my mind. I hope it was therapeutic and not detrimental to my self esteem.
1) I have a favorite pen. It is a cheap, BiC brand pen, but it is fine point. Fine point pens are the only pens I want anything to do with. I love them. Since my pens kept vanishing from my office I attacked my current one with the label maker. I didn't just put the label down the side of the pen. Oh no, that wouldn't do. I put it on there like a flag. ----And I have a nervous habit of spinning my pen in my fingers during meetings so the little flag whips around and around.
2) There are pictures of my dogs and cats hanging on my desk in the place where shots of happy, chubby babies should be. I update them frequently and share stories about them when mothers try to brag about their angelic children.
That is all I can think of. It is hard to critique yourself. Other than those two examples, I suppose I must be perfect! Yes. Perfect.
What's in a name...
For the past few weeks I've been worrying about my grandmother, Eva. She's always been a very strong woman but suddenly, about a month ago, her mind started to go. Paranoia rules her day and she has my father and aunts very concerned.
Ironically, there is a woman I work with who happens to have the same first name as my grandmother. She too is a little loony at times. I love her to death and am grateful that I share an office with people I enjoy. So please understand that I call her "loony" with love. :-) For a while I wondered if she was just losing her hearing. I tried talking softly to her a number of times and she heard me just fine... even with background noise.
Today I was talking to some people in our office about doing a facility walk-through (where we look for problems that need to be addressed) and I mentioned that I was going to re-do the form for them so they would be easier. Not 10 seconds later, Co-worker Eva turned to me and said "Did you make that new walk-through yet?"
*awkward silence*
Um.... no.
I left the room to look up something in one of the charts and returned a few minutes later holding a helmet. "Look, guys! I just found *Frank's helmet in the Chart Room. It's been missing for months!" Without missing a beat, Eva turned and said "That's a neat new helmet. Who is it for?"
Last week I told her I was going to the break room to heat up my lunch and that I would be back in 5 minutes. Since no one was using the microwave, my absence from the office was more like 3 minutes. When I returned, Co-Worker Eva got all flustered and said she had just sent away some potential applicants. When asked 'Why??' she told me that she thought I had gone out to lunch and wouldn't be back for an hour.
Just now she turned to me and said (and I quote!) "Is '12:10' a.m. or p.m.?"
(She was NOT referring to military time, for the record.)
Ms.B
*Name changed to protect the innocent... or guilty, whichever he may be.
Ironically, there is a woman I work with who happens to have the same first name as my grandmother. She too is a little loony at times. I love her to death and am grateful that I share an office with people I enjoy. So please understand that I call her "loony" with love. :-) For a while I wondered if she was just losing her hearing. I tried talking softly to her a number of times and she heard me just fine... even with background noise.
Today I was talking to some people in our office about doing a facility walk-through (where we look for problems that need to be addressed) and I mentioned that I was going to re-do the form for them so they would be easier. Not 10 seconds later, Co-worker Eva turned to me and said "Did you make that new walk-through yet?"
*awkward silence*
Um.... no.
I left the room to look up something in one of the charts and returned a few minutes later holding a helmet. "Look, guys! I just found *Frank's helmet in the Chart Room. It's been missing for months!" Without missing a beat, Eva turned and said "That's a neat new helmet. Who is it for?"
Last week I told her I was going to the break room to heat up my lunch and that I would be back in 5 minutes. Since no one was using the microwave, my absence from the office was more like 3 minutes. When I returned, Co-Worker Eva got all flustered and said she had just sent away some potential applicants. When asked 'Why??' she told me that she thought I had gone out to lunch and wouldn't be back for an hour.
Just now she turned to me and said (and I quote!) "Is '12:10' a.m. or p.m.?"
(She was NOT referring to military time, for the record.)
Ms.B
*Name changed to protect the innocent... or guilty, whichever he may be.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
I guess I deserved it...
The DH and I have a solid relationship which, I suppose, is caused by the fact that we could do nothing but talk on the phone for 5 solid months when we first met. Since we are both very avid phone talkers, it forced us to build a friendship without getting distracted by all the fun, physical stuff. I'm sure you know how that goes. Being together is extra special now and we don't take it for granted. It causes us to do all the mooshy, thoughtful stuff that newly-weds do. This includes walking each other to the door as we are heading off to work.
This morning seemed no different. I gathered my stuff up, walked to the door, and stopped to hug him goodbye. A hug and a kiss later I was out the door. As I reached the bottom of the steps, DH called out "Wait!" Thinking he wanted another kiss, (We're disgustingly sappy like that!) I turned back towards the door. "You forgot this!", he said. .......And offered me our TV remote.
What a punk!
Ms.B
This morning seemed no different. I gathered my stuff up, walked to the door, and stopped to hug him goodbye. A hug and a kiss later I was out the door. As I reached the bottom of the steps, DH called out "Wait!" Thinking he wanted another kiss, (We're disgustingly sappy like that!) I turned back towards the door. "You forgot this!", he said. .......And offered me our TV remote.
What a punk!
Ms.B
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Need sleep? Not me!
My bladder is an odd duck. There is no rhyme or reason for why it acts the way it does. Some days, I think it must be on vacation because it never wants to "go". Other days, I'd better have a good book handy because I'm living in the bathroom.
This morning, at 4:30, 5:25, 6:00, and 7:20 a.m., it woke me up and told me it needed a little trip down the hall to the bathroom. The first two times I gave in. The second two, I was pissed (no pun intended) and didn't want to leave the snug comfort of my bed. A battle of wills ensued with the bladder twinging and hiccuping wilding in an effort to get my attention, and me laying stubbornly in bed, not wanting to get up. The battle accomplished two things. #1: I taught my bladder who was boss. Me, Dammit, ME!! and #2: I got no sleep from about 6:00 on. I just tossed and turned, much to the horror of my DH who was laying beside me in the bed. Finally, at about 7:30 I got up and made my trip to the porcelain throne. Still very tired at this point, I managed to trip over all three of the cats as they each darted in between my dragging feet. At last I made it to the bathroom. Ah,.... relief.
I managed to get ready for work as quickly as possible but wasn't moving as fast as I would have liked. I shuffled to the bedroom for my clothes, only to realize that the shirt I wanted to wear was in another room. Of course, as luck would have it, the shirt I was planning to wear was horribly wrinkled and so I tossed it into the clothes dryer in an attempt to flatten it out a bit. Oh, and wouldn't you know it, I forgot to wash my socks. Poor DH. I stole his last pair of clean black tube socks. Hope he doesn't need to wear them today. (Shhhh, don't tell him!) I eventually found enough clean clothes to wear and put myself together.
After discovering I had nothing to take for a lunch, I headed for the front door. "Wait a sec, it seems like I've forgotten something... OH! My cell phone!" I tossed my purse, keys and bottle of water on the chair near the door and back down the stairs I went to find it.
At long last the cell phone was located, and its was time to go. So I kissed the DH goodbye, scratched the animals on the head, scooped up my purse and other items from the chair and headed towards the car. As I reached my vehicle I grabbed the T.V. remote and attempted to use it to open the lock. Wait. The remote? What the hell? Back to the front door I went only to find that it was locked. I rang the bell and listened to the dogs bark their brains out as I waited for DH to come to the rescue. I didn't have to say a word as I handed him the remote. I returned to the car with the sounds of his laughter ringing in my ears.
It's going to be a good day.
Ms.B
p.s. I hope I remember to do the laundry tonight!
This morning, at 4:30, 5:25, 6:00, and 7:20 a.m., it woke me up and told me it needed a little trip down the hall to the bathroom. The first two times I gave in. The second two, I was pissed (no pun intended) and didn't want to leave the snug comfort of my bed. A battle of wills ensued with the bladder twinging and hiccuping wilding in an effort to get my attention, and me laying stubbornly in bed, not wanting to get up. The battle accomplished two things. #1: I taught my bladder who was boss. Me, Dammit, ME!! and #2: I got no sleep from about 6:00 on. I just tossed and turned, much to the horror of my DH who was laying beside me in the bed. Finally, at about 7:30 I got up and made my trip to the porcelain throne. Still very tired at this point, I managed to trip over all three of the cats as they each darted in between my dragging feet. At last I made it to the bathroom. Ah,.... relief.
I managed to get ready for work as quickly as possible but wasn't moving as fast as I would have liked. I shuffled to the bedroom for my clothes, only to realize that the shirt I wanted to wear was in another room. Of course, as luck would have it, the shirt I was planning to wear was horribly wrinkled and so I tossed it into the clothes dryer in an attempt to flatten it out a bit. Oh, and wouldn't you know it, I forgot to wash my socks. Poor DH. I stole his last pair of clean black tube socks. Hope he doesn't need to wear them today. (Shhhh, don't tell him!) I eventually found enough clean clothes to wear and put myself together.
After discovering I had nothing to take for a lunch, I headed for the front door. "Wait a sec, it seems like I've forgotten something... OH! My cell phone!" I tossed my purse, keys and bottle of water on the chair near the door and back down the stairs I went to find it.
At long last the cell phone was located, and its was time to go. So I kissed the DH goodbye, scratched the animals on the head, scooped up my purse and other items from the chair and headed towards the car. As I reached my vehicle I grabbed the T.V. remote and attempted to use it to open the lock. Wait. The remote? What the hell? Back to the front door I went only to find that it was locked. I rang the bell and listened to the dogs bark their brains out as I waited for DH to come to the rescue. I didn't have to say a word as I handed him the remote. I returned to the car with the sounds of his laughter ringing in my ears.
It's going to be a good day.
Ms.B
p.s. I hope I remember to do the laundry tonight!
Monday, June 18, 2007
Which Side?
My cousin, Scott, a published author, is a professor at a University in the Rocky Mountain region. Due to the nature of his job, he has a blog where he makes amusing entries, and shares his latest art work. The other day I visited his blog and found the following story. It made me smile.
*********
The other day I went to the doctor. As normal I filled out the health history sheet. One of the questions asked about family members that have had cancer. I checked that my grandmother had had cancer.
During the office visit, the doctor said, "What kind of cancer did your grandmother have?"
"Breast cancer," I responded.
"Which side?" the doctor asked.
"I don't know." was my confused response.
At this moment, my wife and doctor begin laughing at me and I have no idea why.
Then my wife said very slowly, "Which side of the family?"
**********
Scott was recently diagnosed with Liver Cancer. He and his wife are currently making routine trips from his home to a nearby state for treatments. It's nice to see that his illness hasn't affected his sense of humor.
If anyone reading this happens to be of a religious persuasion and could keep Scott in their prayers, our family would greatly appreciate it. He has a good chance of survival, but every little bit of support helps.
Ms.B
*********
The other day I went to the doctor. As normal I filled out the health history sheet. One of the questions asked about family members that have had cancer. I checked that my grandmother had had cancer.
During the office visit, the doctor said, "What kind of cancer did your grandmother have?"
"Breast cancer," I responded.
"Which side?" the doctor asked.
"I don't know." was my confused response.
At this moment, my wife and doctor begin laughing at me and I have no idea why.
Then my wife said very slowly, "Which side of the family?"
**********
Scott was recently diagnosed with Liver Cancer. He and his wife are currently making routine trips from his home to a nearby state for treatments. It's nice to see that his illness hasn't affected his sense of humor.
If anyone reading this happens to be of a religious persuasion and could keep Scott in their prayers, our family would greatly appreciate it. He has a good chance of survival, but every little bit of support helps.
Ms.B
Thursday, June 14, 2007
What NOT to do in an interview: Part 2
Interview No-No #4: Showing up to your scheduled appointment late. Very late.
I had an interview scheduled yesterday for 11:00 a.m. I've been fortunate in my work history not to have to experience the stress of the interview process very often. And I have never had someone sit me down and teach me any interview etiquette. But honestly, isn't it common sense to know that you aren't going to make a very good impression if you show up horribly late for your appointment? Yesterday at 11:00 the phone rang. "I'm just leaving my doctor's office. I had a physical done. I'll be there soon." I had no problem with that. I thanked the lady for letting us know. I gave the Program Director a heads-up that it would be a few extra minutes and then we waited. And waited. And WAITED!! Finally, at 12:30, we took our lunch breaks. Wouldn't you know it, as we were happily munching away, thebitch lady arrives. Not the best impression to make, considering that she was 5 hours late the day she filled out her application in the first place. Don't think we'll be hiring her... and we are REALLY short staffed. We need people right now.
(Side note: MOVE TO UTAH! We need employees here. It's a great place. Ignore the shit you've heard about the evil Mormons. They are wonderful people, and they only have ONE wife at a time these days. I'll hire you if you move here. $8.50 an hour is all yours. Just show up on time for your interview! Oops! I just said I was from Utah. Um... not telling what part though. Secret.)
Interview No-No #5: Run your yap during the interview.
Okay, perhaps that seems contradict itself. Two weeks ago a woman stopped by to fill out an application after seeing the "help wanted" sign in front of the building. She swiftly filled it out and left after I told her we'd be in touch. Over-all Impression: On a scale of 1-10: 10!
She stuck her head in my office about 5 minutes later and asked if her husband could pick through our garbage and take stuff home. Over-all impression: 3?
I called her and arranged for her to come in for an interview at 10:00 the next morning. When I arrived at my office around 9:00, she was waiting for me. Over-all impression: 2
We sat down, I pulled out my standard interview form and attempted to interview her. In the next hour I learned that she was on her third marriage, that her first two husbands abused her, and that she's tried to take the CNA tests multiple times, each time failing. She hated drunk drivers and forced them to stay at her house if they were drunk. She would hide their keys. (Good girl.) I learned that she had a learning disability and had a job coach. This coach would attend the first few months with her to help her learn the job. (No problem, we could work with that if she was willing to work hard.) She said that if she abused the residents we could talk to her and not involve the job coach. (RED ALERT, RED ALERT!) I'm sure her favorite color, foods and blood type must have come up too but thankfully I've managed to block some of it from memory.
My interview form still sat at my desk at the end of that interview. Not once had I picked up my pen and made any notes. This is because I never had a chance to ask any of my questions. Every time I tried to twist the conversation around to things I needed to know she just kept on talking! I sat there slack-jawed for an hour listening to her ramble on and on... and on.... and on....
and on.... and on... and ON! Over-all impression: -5.
*ahem* Yes, I didn't hire her either. Call me picky.
Ms.B
I had an interview scheduled yesterday for 11:00 a.m. I've been fortunate in my work history not to have to experience the stress of the interview process very often. And I have never had someone sit me down and teach me any interview etiquette. But honestly, isn't it common sense to know that you aren't going to make a very good impression if you show up horribly late for your appointment? Yesterday at 11:00 the phone rang. "I'm just leaving my doctor's office. I had a physical done. I'll be there soon." I had no problem with that. I thanked the lady for letting us know. I gave the Program Director a heads-up that it would be a few extra minutes and then we waited. And waited. And WAITED!! Finally, at 12:30, we took our lunch breaks. Wouldn't you know it, as we were happily munching away, the
(Side note: MOVE TO UTAH! We need employees here. It's a great place. Ignore the shit you've heard about the evil Mormons. They are wonderful people, and they only have ONE wife at a time these days. I'll hire you if you move here. $8.50 an hour is all yours. Just show up on time for your interview! Oops! I just said I was from Utah. Um... not telling what part though. Secret.)
Interview No-No #5: Run your yap during the interview.
Okay, perhaps that seems contradict itself. Two weeks ago a woman stopped by to fill out an application after seeing the "help wanted" sign in front of the building. She swiftly filled it out and left after I told her we'd be in touch. Over-all Impression: On a scale of 1-10: 10!
She stuck her head in my office about 5 minutes later and asked if her husband could pick through our garbage and take stuff home. Over-all impression: 3?
I called her and arranged for her to come in for an interview at 10:00 the next morning. When I arrived at my office around 9:00, she was waiting for me. Over-all impression: 2
We sat down, I pulled out my standard interview form and attempted to interview her. In the next hour I learned that she was on her third marriage, that her first two husbands abused her, and that she's tried to take the CNA tests multiple times, each time failing. She hated drunk drivers and forced them to stay at her house if they were drunk. She would hide their keys. (Good girl.) I learned that she had a learning disability and had a job coach. This coach would attend the first few months with her to help her learn the job. (No problem, we could work with that if she was willing to work hard.) She said that if she abused the residents we could talk to her and not involve the job coach. (RED ALERT, RED ALERT!) I'm sure her favorite color, foods and blood type must have come up too but thankfully I've managed to block some of it from memory.
My interview form still sat at my desk at the end of that interview. Not once had I picked up my pen and made any notes. This is because I never had a chance to ask any of my questions. Every time I tried to twist the conversation around to things I needed to know she just kept on talking! I sat there slack-jawed for an hour listening to her ramble on and on... and on.... and on....
and on.... and on... and ON! Over-all impression: -5.
*ahem* Yes, I didn't hire her either. Call me picky.
Ms.B
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
DH loves me...
I know this, not because he rubs my back and shoulders whenever I want,
not because he cooks me dinner on a regular basis,
not because he takes out the trash every week,
not because he cleans out the litter boxes,
not because he brings me lunch at work whenever he can,
not because he gives up some sleep to help me fix things around the Haven,
not because he lets his hair grow long enough to curl (even though he loves it buzzed short),
not because he says cute, charming things to brighten my day,
not because he dropped out of a University, sold his house, left his family, and went through the arduous process of obtaining a fiance' visa in order to move down here to marry me...
but because he bought me a pink Spardel. I have a pink Spardel to go with my newly painted Pink Lenny!
Help me! Still waiting for my NeoPets intervention.
not because he cooks me dinner on a regular basis,
not because he takes out the trash every week,
not because he cleans out the litter boxes,
not because he brings me lunch at work whenever he can,
not because he gives up some sleep to help me fix things around the Haven,
not because he lets his hair grow long enough to curl (even though he loves it buzzed short),
not because he says cute, charming things to brighten my day,
not because he dropped out of a University, sold his house, left his family, and went through the arduous process of obtaining a fiance' visa in order to move down here to marry me...
but because he bought me a pink Spardel. I have a pink Spardel to go with my newly painted Pink Lenny!
Help me! Still waiting for my NeoPets intervention.
What NOT to do in an interview: Part 1
For a few years now I've kicked myself for not making a list of the stupid, asinine, moronic things that some people do when coming in to apply for a job at the care center. Therefore I really must take this opportunity to share the "no no"s of job hunting.
Bare in mind that the care center is a laid back atmosphere. We let a lot of things slide. Wearing jeans during your interview isn't going to bug us, although we do appreciate when someone takes the time to dress up. When something stands out as a really bad move, there is a very good chance that you aren't going to get the job. After all, if you can't survive the interview process, you aren't going to last very long with the crazy direct care staff.
Interview No-No #1: Calling on the phone to ask about the job and trying to do the interview over the phone.
I don't know who you are, when you call me. If you need to know something about the job that you saw advertised, great. I'll happily answer any question you have, even the ones whose answers are IN the ad you saw. No problem. But, by all means, do NOT start talking my ear off about your 25 years of experience and how you have 12 mothers-in-law that have special needs. I really don't care. I don't. Show up in person, fill out your application, knock my socks off in an interview and you'll have the job.
Interview No-No #2: Do NOT show up with your friend, spouse, or 7 children.
If you are serious about job hunting, show up alone. If I have to baby sit your kids while you are filling out the application, I will NOT call you for an interview. And don't think that the knowledge of small babies or an ugly spouse is going to make me pity you. I just pisses me off.
True Story: Last year, shortly before our yearly fundraising carnival, I had two women and 5 children show up. Since that many people would be a tight squeeze in my office, I invited them to sit in the Conference Room to fill out their applications. At that point in time, we had received numerous donations for prizes at the carnival and, with no other place to put them, we had placed them, still wrapped and bagged, in the Conference Room. I made sure that each woman had a pen, propped their door open, and sat down at my desk, which coincidentally is right across the hall. Minutes later one of the children shut the door. At first, I wondered if they were just playing with the door but when it didn't open back up after a minute, I walked over and unlocked it. There, inside the room were the two women happily chatting while the oldest child filled out the applications for them. The youngest two children had taken the liberty of opening up the bags of donated prizes and had removed them from their packages. As politely as I could manage, I shooed them all out the door and attempted to re-wrap the toys.
!! ?? WHAT THE HELL?? !!
Honestly, if you are going to have small children in an area like that, at least teach them enough manners to stay out of stuff that isn't theirs. And don't think that locking a door is going to keep someone out when they are the one that unlocked it for you in the first place. DUH!
Oh, and this story reminds me of one more no-no.
Interview No-No #3: Fill out your own damn application.
I love diversity. I love languages aside from the every-day English that I hear. I do. I once dated a guy with the sexiest accent. I think he was from Pakistan. His voice was Oooh-lala to me. I've even tried to learn Spanish, German & Japanese. Spanish in grade school, German in Junior High, and Japanese in college. Perhaps if I had stuck to just ONE of the three I'd even be bilingual now. (Instead I mix them all together and it comes out a mess. Doko wa toilette, bitte? Gracias.)
HOWEVER, if you are going to apply for a job, any job, regardless of your native language, be able to fill out the application by yourself. PLEASE! If you can't apply on your own, you can't fill out new-hire paperwork on your own. And if you can't do the initial paperwork, you probably won't have a very easy time in Orientation, MANDT training, or the staff meetings. It might help if you can understand and answer the questions in your initial interview as well. As luck would have it, two of our management staff are fluent in Spanish, which is great since it is the most common non-English language spoke by applicants. If you want to work in their departments, great. You can interview and train with them and they'll understand. Sweet!
But fill out your own damn application.
Ms.B
Bare in mind that the care center is a laid back atmosphere. We let a lot of things slide. Wearing jeans during your interview isn't going to bug us, although we do appreciate when someone takes the time to dress up. When something stands out as a really bad move, there is a very good chance that you aren't going to get the job. After all, if you can't survive the interview process, you aren't going to last very long with the crazy direct care staff.
Interview No-No #1: Calling on the phone to ask about the job and trying to do the interview over the phone.
I don't know who you are, when you call me. If you need to know something about the job that you saw advertised, great. I'll happily answer any question you have, even the ones whose answers are IN the ad you saw. No problem. But, by all means, do NOT start talking my ear off about your 25 years of experience and how you have 12 mothers-in-law that have special needs. I really don't care. I don't. Show up in person, fill out your application, knock my socks off in an interview and you'll have the job.
Interview No-No #2: Do NOT show up with your friend, spouse, or 7 children.
If you are serious about job hunting, show up alone. If I have to baby sit your kids while you are filling out the application, I will NOT call you for an interview. And don't think that the knowledge of small babies or an ugly spouse is going to make me pity you. I just pisses me off.
True Story: Last year, shortly before our yearly fundraising carnival, I had two women and 5 children show up. Since that many people would be a tight squeeze in my office, I invited them to sit in the Conference Room to fill out their applications. At that point in time, we had received numerous donations for prizes at the carnival and, with no other place to put them, we had placed them, still wrapped and bagged, in the Conference Room. I made sure that each woman had a pen, propped their door open, and sat down at my desk, which coincidentally is right across the hall. Minutes later one of the children shut the door. At first, I wondered if they were just playing with the door but when it didn't open back up after a minute, I walked over and unlocked it. There, inside the room were the two women happily chatting while the oldest child filled out the applications for them. The youngest two children had taken the liberty of opening up the bags of donated prizes and had removed them from their packages. As politely as I could manage, I shooed them all out the door and attempted to re-wrap the toys.
!! ?? WHAT THE HELL?? !!
Honestly, if you are going to have small children in an area like that, at least teach them enough manners to stay out of stuff that isn't theirs. And don't think that locking a door is going to keep someone out when they are the one that unlocked it for you in the first place. DUH!
Oh, and this story reminds me of one more no-no.
Interview No-No #3: Fill out your own damn application.
I love diversity. I love languages aside from the every-day English that I hear. I do. I once dated a guy with the sexiest accent. I think he was from Pakistan. His voice was Oooh-lala to me. I've even tried to learn Spanish, German & Japanese. Spanish in grade school, German in Junior High, and Japanese in college. Perhaps if I had stuck to just ONE of the three I'd even be bilingual now. (Instead I mix them all together and it comes out a mess. Doko wa toilette, bitte? Gracias.)
HOWEVER, if you are going to apply for a job, any job, regardless of your native language, be able to fill out the application by yourself. PLEASE! If you can't apply on your own, you can't fill out new-hire paperwork on your own. And if you can't do the initial paperwork, you probably won't have a very easy time in Orientation, MANDT training, or the staff meetings. It might help if you can understand and answer the questions in your initial interview as well. As luck would have it, two of our management staff are fluent in Spanish, which is great since it is the most common non-English language spoke by applicants. If you want to work in their departments, great. You can interview and train with them and they'll understand. Sweet!
But fill out your own damn application.
Ms.B
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