1:30 a.m.

What on earth am I doing awake? Honestly now, all good girls should be asleep in their beds, yet here I am blogging.

Tonight, as I was whisking DH out the door to work, my cell phone rang. It was my good buddy, M.

I met M at about the same time I met my husband. Nice guy. Mid-40s. Divorced 3 times.

Anyhow, from the moment we met, M and I hit it off. Not in a romantic sense, but it was as if we'd been friends for years. Good, platonic, easy-going friends. Nothing more. EVER!

We'd get together and talk about the dates we'd been on with other people. When I met DH, M cheered me on and was happy that I was happy. When he met his current wife online I did the same for him.

He and his wife, E, wed on June 3 of last year, about 8 1/2 months after my own wedding. It was the fourth marriage for M, the first for E. She is from the Ukraine so M&E had to go through the same VISA process as DH and I. Oh, the joys of importing your spouse. M&E tied the knot in Las Vegas, Nevada. DH and I were there for the occasion and we all had a grand time that weekend. Things seemed to be going well.

That's why M's phone call caught me a little off guard.

I really need someone to talk to. E is working 3 jobs and spends her entire day angry with the world. She doesn't cheer up until 8:30 at night. It's like we are roommates instead of married. She goes out with her friends and seems really happy but when she comes home to me she turns mean.

... I didn't know what to say. I hadn't realized it was so bad. Then he shared more.

We aren't doing anything for our anniversary next week. I offered to send her to Vegas with a friend. I'm not going. There isn't even any reason to rent a room somewhere. We haven't had sex since our honeymoon.

.... What does a good friend SAY to that?

E told me that if I want sex, all I have to do is ask. But every time I've hinted at it she's turned me down. She says she's not as easy as American girls.

.... What does an American friend say to that!!!

I suggested he talk to her about how he feels and he said he already had; that E had told him that she "is the way she is" and nothing would change. Even though he insisted that he still loved her, I could tell he was defeated. My heart broke for him. I managed to survive the rest of the conversation by low-level-managing M with comments like "That's so horrible.", "Hrmm..." and "I'm so sorry!".

Near the end of the phone call he had one more unexpected comment for me.

Some time you should send "DH" to work and you and I can catch a movie together, just you and me.

I gave the obligatory response of "Oh, sure. Maybe we can do that some time. I hope you feel better soon, blah blah blah." that supportive friends DO but my heart wasn't in it this time. Why on EARTH would he need to have me send off my DH and spend alone time with me? I know he needs a friend and I definitely want to be there for him but I am wise enough to see the trouble that a situation like that could lead to.

We'd go see a flick, then he'd drive me home. In the drive-way he'd start to cry about the demise of his marriage and I'd hug him for comfort. Then one thing could lead to another and.... I'd have to kick his ass for trying to make a move on me. A great friendship would be destroyed. I can't risk it. And even if the night was innocent, how would it appear to his wife?

Perhaps I am jumping to conclusions about M's intentions. Maybe the extra attention I've received from Mr.PBM lately has given me illusions of grandeur regarding my effect on the male species.

Perhaps.

Ms.B